Monday, June 13, 2016

Tear Jerker

So its been "one of those last couple of days" that everything I see, think or watch makes me cry.  Why do us women have to be this way?  I'm going through this stage in life where I'm realizing that I'm not 25 anymore (nor do I want to be that age again, lol) but just something has really hit me here so hard.  The fact that I'm edging closer to 40 than 30.  I have enjoyed mother hood so so much!  Every part of it, the pregnancy, delivery, the nursing all hours of the night, being the only one they wanted when they cried, teaching them to walk, talk, just all of it!  I do enjoy the ages that they are at now also.  Seeing them realize that they are big enough to have their on responsibilities.  The changes that are among us are not going to always be fun, (tweens!) sigh...... but I am embracing each part because I know it only last for a short time and then it moves on to the next thing.

But where I'm at as mom feels devastating.  I enjoyed the baby stage so much!  So now its like that word "Final"  no going back, no experiencing the nursing, burping, baby food, teething, teaching to walk, all these sweet moments are over for me.  I have to wait to become a grandmother to experience this again. (excuse me while I wipe the tears off the keyboard, because I am crying as I write this.  My husband says I'm nuts.... we have four precious, beautiful, healthy children.  I have been pregnant 5 times.  (I lost twins in between baby 1 and 2)  My husband feels like we have finally "arrived"  could you hear the music playing dun ta dun dun...... as I said arrived.  We for the most part,  get to sleep through the night and have everyone in their own beds now.  But for me it's heart breaking.  I don't know why I feel this way.  I would love to have a couple more but I know that this chapter of my life is over.  I guess that's what make me so sad.  Hear lately I have been listening to this song by Nichole Nordeman called Slow Down.  I boo hoo every time I listen to it.  Its the perfect song for the way I have felt lately.  I listen to KLove all the time and they play it all the time, but if you don't listen to that station, please take a few mins and watch this video and listen to the song.  Of course listening to it a couple of times makes it even more special.  It is a excellent song, for all mothers!   Slow Down by Nichole Nordeman

Please be in prayer for me, that these sad feelings pass soon.  God knows best, there is a reason he made us to be like we are, but closing a door of life is always hard.

Oh and feel free to sob, I was in the car the other day singing and crying at the same time, while my husband looks on with this dazed and confused look, says, "what?" I'm wiping the tears away saying, "Don't you get it?"  Nope, No they don't! So I cry through the rest of the song thinking, "How beautiful!" but then when its over I'm mad??? So like what alien took over my body?
 I look at him, while he is waiting for me to explain and say, "STUPID SONG" and he's like OOOOK.... Thank Goodness I have a patient man!  Well, I hope that you, if you are a mom, that is struggling like I am with loosing the baby stage you will enjoy this song and the good cry that goes along with it!



Tuesday, June 7, 2016


I wish that I had wrote this post when I listen to the message a couple of weeks ago in my quiet time and said, "Wow, this is awesome way to think of how we should love each other!"

If you have read any of my other blog post then you know that my husband and I love to listen to Pastor James McDonald from Walk in the Word Ministries.   This past week I was listening to a series that talks about husbands and wives and their roles and what they can do to help improve their marriage.  As I sit and listen to the message, it is directed towards the different roles that a marriage has and how we are to do our parts.  The message that I'm including as a link is driven towards husbands, but when ever he is preaching even if its towards the men I still take and apply anything I can that will help me to do better at doing my part.  The message is centered around Ephesians 5:22 and how Christ loves the church and how we are to apply this to our marriages.
I found that he talks of doing this simple thing. "You before Me"

After listening to this and how this is what Christ did for us, it made me want to think on this daily.  If we would all apply this not only to our marriages but to everyone and everything in life imagine with life would be like?  So I urge you to listen to this message.  Especially men, if you want to understand your wives, or have the best marriage possible you can really learn a lot of things by listening.  To be able to really tone in and understand what Christ meant to love your wives as He loved the church.  I'm so blessed to have a wonderful husband that understands this.  He understood this even earlier than what I did.  We have days were we have to really help each other, but for the most part he and I understand now what the scripture means.  I am so truly blessed and thankful that the Lord put us together.

I hate that when I heard the message I didn't sit down and write this, I took notes and knew I wanted to make a post but am just getting around to it and now the link is gone on their website because they are constantly putting on new messages, but I did find it on you tube.  So here is the link, but you will have to watch it instead of just listening.

The Matter of Marital Roles

I hope that you enjoy this as much as we do.

Love and Prayers